Educators abound

Sometimes people enter our lives for the sole purpose of being our teachers. In some situations, it's incredibly easy to discern who these teachers are - they usually are our mentors in some form or fashion, on a physical, mental, and/or emotional level. These mentors are precious, and if you can open yourself up fully to absorb what is unknown to you, you will be all the greater for it.

What I'm referencing in particular though, are those people that just piss you the fuck off; that wound you with hurtful criticisms that are completely seemingly unfair or unfounded; that sadden you with abusive displays; that cause you to puff your chest up and lift your nose high with self-imposed superiority. These people can be drifters that pass through your existence but briefly, or can be rooted deeply in your layout of important individuals.

The truth is, we can never control another human being, nor can we expect them to be any other than what they are. We can try to pick and choose who we want to be our friends; but, let's be honest, most of us don't. And perhaps, maybe we shouldn't.

Unless someone is being abusive or leaves you feeling drained of your vital energy, then, more often than not, any interaction can serve to be educational and beneficial.

The other day I was in a grocery store, grabbing a bag of lettuce for dinner, and was standing in line with my motorcycle helmet in tow. A man got in line behind me, and said in what I perceived to be a rather condescending, belittling tone, "You know, you could have just left the helmet outside with your bike. It's not like anyone is going to steal that thing." I turned and looked at him and asked, rather prickly, what the hell that was supposed to mean. And he responded, sharing a look with the cashier like he was in on some little secret, "Oh, I can't imagine what I could mean by that." I responded that my boyfriend was circling around on the bike, and had to take my helmet, and so he apologized. I turned back to the cashier, whom was looking rather chagrined at this point. Grabbing my bag of groceries, I turned back to the gentleman in line behind me and coldly said, "Next time, you might want to think twice before you open your mouth." He smiled, and wished me a good day, and I left, feeling my feathers continue to ruffle.

I'm still not entirely sure why he said what he did -- aside from the fact that my helmet is rather badass :), I couldn't understand what he would go out of his way to say that, unless I somehow interpreted it wrong. Yet my initial response was defense, and I chose anger, rather than embarrassment or melancholy.

The truth is this: that's something I needed to work on, and I failed to recognize this man as an educator, but rather, saw him as an instigator. I don't take criticism well, and I certainly wasn't fond of some stranger offering it as I saw it. What better way though to become more well-rounded and more complete as a person than to seize every opportunity I can get to iron out the wrinkles? The less I feed the superficial ego, the more the underlying depth and substance can be nourished. What I don't feed the ego will certainly feed my being, and that's all those inflamed responses are: my ego trying to protect itself. Whose ego ever truly made them happy, though? Just a thought.

So next time, even if I don't say it outright, I'm going to try to think, "Wow, thank you for giving me an opportunity to work on this! How awesome."

I gleefully carved a pumpkin on Sunday, the second one of my life. Doug and I went to a pumpkin patch in town, and I took a good 15 minutes to pick out my pumpkin. We came home and went to carving; I might have been a bit obsessive about mine, so thanks to Doug for his tolerance and good humor :) It's so important to partake in play with abandon!

Rawr. :j